Been TOO long….

It’s been too long since I’ve been here to post anything, just been busy with this thing called life and speaking of such life I must pause a moment in one we lost most recently, one who held my teen years hostage in his songs, Prince. Whether you liked him or not no matter but it was still a life lost.

— Pause—

Anyways, as I had mentioned it’s been a long time since I’ve come here to post and I totally missed posting on here during April, Autism Awareness Month and I’m a bit bummed about that as I had plans to post more awareness for females on the spectrum but I know I can always post so I’m not that bummed about that. There still needs to be more awareness about females on the spectrum so that girls aren’t left behind as I was. I didn’t know until I was 42 that I had Asperger’s Syndrome. Had I known or even my mom known when I was a girl in elementary school maybe I could’ve had more help towards my emotions, moods, anxieties and phobias. Course my mom had me evaluated and tested back when I was in 3rd grade in the early 80’s, they told my mom I was just a little slow and had some learning difficulties in the area of math, some speech problems, memory issues and difficulties understanding of sarcasms and idioms where I took them literally. I had help in math up until 10th grade as I didn’t require any more credits in math and I had speech up until 8th grade. I was so embarrassed to be in those classes and afraid that other students would find out and I would be laughed at, though no one ever found out thankfully.

Coming here to voice my opinions and tell my life story helps in some ways, though not completely as I have deep, very deep wounds from my parents and how I was raised. I never got “beatings” but let’s say words cut deeper than any spanking and they last forever. I think so much about those words all the time especially during certain times.

Lastly, I’ve learned that getting older stinks! Ok, until next time which I hope I won’t take forever to return to bore you with a little humor, maybe dry at times but I hope not. Good day  😉

 

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My Introverted World…

While I see many people enjoy going out and being surrounded by others there’s just no way I would enjoy doing that. A crowd makes me sweat and super nervous!
Hell being on the phone with a strange person makes my brain jiggle like jello, forget answering a straight answer without jumbling up my words and feel like a rushed turtle sweating bullets to make it across the line before that damn rabbit!!

I totally give myself away in public, look like a nervous Nelly or maybe someone whose a crack addict or one who is in the process of stealing…I know, how do I know what those kind of people act like well I love the show Intervention on a&e and I use to work in security (long time ago, was the perfect job for someone like me..work night shift and almost a skeleton crew).

I’m happiest at home being with my family and fur babies. We eat out but during calm, slow, before the hungry crowds…OK so usually around 4ish or we get it to go.
We do enjoy going to the movies and the last one we, husband and I, saw was San Andreas though it was the middle of the day and we we’re the only 2 there watching!

I see movies and shows of couples throwing such lovely parties, girl parties, bbq’s, etc…how I would love to do those but only deep down, I know I would never because any more than just us is too much for me to handle.